So what makes a Beauty, to like a Beast?

Here, I will not make distinction of Beauty and Beast on the basis of gender. Either of a Boy or a Girl can be a Beauty or a Beast.

So question is, what makes a Beauty to like a Beast? Here this notion of Liking need to be analyzed. Generally it is seen that this liking  is governed by two factors. Liking on the basis of Bodily Aspects, Liking on the basis of Thoughts, Feelings and Behavior towards us. Our liking towards a particular person might be on the basis of first or second or both the factors together!

Generally it is found that Liking on the basis of second factor i.e. Thoughts, Feelings and Behavior is Dominating. This can be seen in several examples, situations. Following are some.

1. When we find Bodily Aspects of Beauty as per our Expectations then we get Attracted towards it but when we find that Thoughts, Feelings and Behavior of that Beauty are not as per our Expectations then we start feeling Repulsion and the beauty of that Beauty on the basis of Bodily Aspects remains no longer Beautiful or Attractive to  us. In fact if we find that Thoughts, Feelings and Behavior of Beauty are bad as per our notions of bad, then we start seeing a beast in that Beauty!

2. We begin with Attraction or Liking on the basis of Bodily Aspects of Beauty. When we spend some time with Beauty and find its Thoughts, Feelings and Behavior as per our Expectations then our Attention start shifting from Bodily Aspects to Thoughts, Feelings and Behavior. Liking because of second factor start Dominating. We start feeling good in the company of Beauty. Now the notions of beauty are changed. We start seeing beauty or start liking on the basis of Thoughts, Feelings and Behavior towards us, more than Bodily Aspects.

3. If we spend some time with a person who is not beautiful as per our notions of beauty of Bodily Aspects, but we find that Thoughts, Feelings and Behavior of that person are as per our notions of good or as per our Expectations, then we start seeing beauty in that person. This kind of beauty even overpasses the beastliness of the Bodily Aspects. Here also we see that second factor i.e. Thoughts, Feelings and Behavior of the person towards us Dominate over Bodily Aspects.

Here we see that second factor i.e. Thoughts, Feelings and Behavior of other person towards us gives us more happiness for more time than the first factor i.e. Bodily Aspects. We see that it is happening, but why it is happening?

In case of Humans, Feeling Component is Dominant and is Ever Actively Working (मनुष्य में भाव पक्ष प्रधान रहता है, तथा नित्य प्रभावी रहता है). A human being wants Unconditional Acceptance from other other person. We can notice that this Expectation of Unconditional Acceptance at least from  people whom we consider close to us, is Ever Actively Present. Whenever we feel that some doubt has come in the mind of person who is close to me then it is not tolerable to me. Unconditional Acceptance means, Unconditional Trust and Unconditional Respect. We expect other person to Trust us Unconditionally, to Respect us Unconditionally i.e. to Evaluate us Rightly always. When we see or feel that these conditions are being satisfied by other person i.e. when we see that other person has started Trusting  us Unconditionally, other person feels good about us, other person has good thoughts, other person understands us and when we start getting assurance that other person will keep on Trusting us Unconditionally, will keep on Evaluating us Rightly Always then it makes us feel really good, it makes us very Happy. We start undermining most of other aspects like cast, creed, religion, bodily aspects and many others!

Mostly in current scenario it happens that we undermine Feeling Component over Bodily Aspects and hastily indulge into commitments. But Feeling Component is Naturally Dominant. One who gave more priority to Bodily Aspects in past once is Satisfied by it, then he starts looking for satisfaction of Feeling Component i.e. Unconditional Trust and Respect. When this Feeling Component is not satisfied then he start seeing a Beast in the Beauty and it leads to several problems in relationships thereafter. We already see many examples of such things almost daily in our society like divorces, court cases, quarrels and even murders!

Generally we feel that by the satisfaction of Bodily Aspects we will be able to ensure Satisfaction of Feeling Component. In most of the cases we are not even aware of this Feeling Component, which is in reality, Dominant !

In some cases even if we are aware of existence Feeling Component, we lack clarity into it so we expect other person to Accept us Unconditionally in our own style or our own way and ultimately we start putting conditions on other person knowingly or unknowingly with which other person start feeling violated and problem persists.

So it is ultimately the Lack of Understanding which is the problem.

Lack of Understanding of Whom is causing the problem? Lack of Understanding “in” Ourselves!

Lack of Understanding of What is causing the problem ? Lack of Understanding “of” Ourselves!

So it is Lack of Understanding of a Human of Him Himself is causing the problem and not the lack of understanding of a Human of Other Human Being.

To understand Trust, Respect, Happiness, Relationships etc. we need Knowledge.

Knowledge includes, understanding related to:-
Self
Family
Society
Nature.